Monday, June 18, 2012
I've been desiring to write a new post for awhile, but it's been a struggle to know what to write about. I don't know how professional bloggers do it! How do you have so much to say on a regular basis? I was reading back through some of my older posts, and I must say that I feel completely inadequate to be sharing my thoughts on a public forum like this. And yet here I am writing again.
Currently, I'm reading through the gospels, which is something that, sadly, I haven't done in a long time. I marvel at the people who are able to digest so much of God's Word as they read. Sometimes I feel like there's just so much, I'm barely grasping at anything. It's like you're falling down a pit so quickly, that instead of grabbing hold of anything solid, you've just got a lot of dirt underneath your fingernails. Only, it's not so dark and hopeless as that. It's really more like I'm just so overwhelmed by the great vastness and depth of God and His revelation. Reading through stories that I've grown up with can be rather monotonous, but I am reminded as I read that these are actual accounts of real events! That's crazy! These things actually happened! My Savior actually walked this earth! And, like any good reader, I can't help but place myself in the story and wonder what my reaction would be like if I had the opportunity to sit and hear Jesus' teachings in the synagogue or on the hillside or in the house of a friend.
The Jewish leaders were so hardened toward Jesus and His message. They continued to test Him and nothing He ever did was good enough for them. No miracle that He performed or prophecy He quoted or parable He told was enough for them. They were determined to be unsatisfied. Jesus could not win. It's like when you get into an argument with someone. You both are so determined that you are right that no reasoning could make either of you change your mind to what you believe to be true. Only, what Jesus said was true. It's a shame that these religious rulers had lost focus on what they were supposed to be leading others in. They had become so wrapped up in themselves that they completely rejected God. Jesus pointed out their hypocrisy time and time again (which, of course, didn't settle well with them either). There's one story that sticks out to me in particular: Lazarus and the rich man. I'm not going to recount the whole story, but the rich ruler, who has died and is now in Hell, pleads with Abraham to send Lazarus (who has also died) to his living relatives to warn them so that they go to Hell when they die. Abraham's answer to the rich man is wrenching. He says that if they are not willing to listen to the prophecies of Moses and those after him, then they will not listen to someone who has raised from the dead. I wonder, if I had been alive 2000 years ago, if I would be like the Pharisees: beyond skeptical. I can see this trait in me, the same stubbornness that the religious leaders showed. It breaks my heart to think that I could respond to the Son of God in that way.
Then there were those who crowed Jesus to hear His teachings and to see Him perform miracles and maybe to ask Him for help or healing themselves. Sometimes I wonder if these crowds really desired to follow Jesus in the way that He taught, taking up their crosses and forsaking everything else- family, riches, status-or if they just followed Him simply because they were fans of His ministry. I think of superstars who are so cool and so popular that they gather a following, but who really cares to know them beyond what they give the public (music, movies, whatever)? Sure, we love them and we would love to meet them and even get a picture with them, but, if we're sensible, we're not going to drop everything to be groupies. We have our own lives that we're content living. I wonder if that's how the crowds followed Jesus. If so, would I be one in the crowd? Would I brag about being one of the five thousand that Jesus fed or seeing Him heal the lame man who was lowered through the roof for bragging's sake? Because I could see myself doing that as well.
Of course, there were Jesus' disciples, too, and not just the twelve. Luke accounts Jesus sending out seventy, in pairs, to teach and perform miracles in His name. I think that the disciples were so sincere in their commitment to Christ, as much as they could be, but their understanding was limited. Of course, when you place any group of people next to God Himself, they're going to fall short. Still, I wonder if they ever looked back to some of the time they had with Jesus and said, "Gosh, we were so foolish! What were we thinking!?" I know I do this often. And I will continue to do this until the end of my life.
I know that I really don't have much to really, truly base any of these characterizations on. But what kind of reader would I be if I didn't impose some of my human experience into what I am reading? I know that reading into Scripture is something to be very careful with, so I'm not equating it with the truth that we do find in God's Word, but if it was true, I wonder what category I would fall into.
I love where the writers of the gospels say that Jesus was moved with compassion for the people. I don't even have any commentary to add to that. Jesus was moved with compassion for the people. I'm not an overly emotional person. I tend to lean toward reason and logic any away from feelings and instinct. But what a wonderful feeling it is to think about the compassion of Christ. All of these people: the Pharisees, the crowds, the disciples, had personal interactions with Jesus, and He was moved with compassion towards them. I have not only read about His compassion, but I have experienced it. As I read about the compassion that Jesus showed many, many years ago, I am reminded of His present compassion that I am able to take part in and experience, and I cannot help but marvel and worship Him for His amazing goodness. We serve a wonderful God. How blessed we are to be called His children- and that is what we are!
God, I am sorry for those times my stubbornness and my pride and even my own ignorance get in the way of truly following you. Thank You for the compassion You showed thousands of years ago. It amazes me to think of how Your love continues even until now. You are not a dead God, but You are living and Your Word is active. God, may Your compassion draw me to repentance and to true discipleship. I may be naive and I may not understand much, but I desire to continue to grow in understanding. Lead me in these things, Lord. I desire to know You and to follow You, but I need You to show me how to do these things.
Currently, I'm reading through the gospels, which is something that, sadly, I haven't done in a long time. I marvel at the people who are able to digest so much of God's Word as they read. Sometimes I feel like there's just so much, I'm barely grasping at anything. It's like you're falling down a pit so quickly, that instead of grabbing hold of anything solid, you've just got a lot of dirt underneath your fingernails. Only, it's not so dark and hopeless as that. It's really more like I'm just so overwhelmed by the great vastness and depth of God and His revelation. Reading through stories that I've grown up with can be rather monotonous, but I am reminded as I read that these are actual accounts of real events! That's crazy! These things actually happened! My Savior actually walked this earth! And, like any good reader, I can't help but place myself in the story and wonder what my reaction would be like if I had the opportunity to sit and hear Jesus' teachings in the synagogue or on the hillside or in the house of a friend.
The Jewish leaders were so hardened toward Jesus and His message. They continued to test Him and nothing He ever did was good enough for them. No miracle that He performed or prophecy He quoted or parable He told was enough for them. They were determined to be unsatisfied. Jesus could not win. It's like when you get into an argument with someone. You both are so determined that you are right that no reasoning could make either of you change your mind to what you believe to be true. Only, what Jesus said was true. It's a shame that these religious rulers had lost focus on what they were supposed to be leading others in. They had become so wrapped up in themselves that they completely rejected God. Jesus pointed out their hypocrisy time and time again (which, of course, didn't settle well with them either). There's one story that sticks out to me in particular: Lazarus and the rich man. I'm not going to recount the whole story, but the rich ruler, who has died and is now in Hell, pleads with Abraham to send Lazarus (who has also died) to his living relatives to warn them so that they go to Hell when they die. Abraham's answer to the rich man is wrenching. He says that if they are not willing to listen to the prophecies of Moses and those after him, then they will not listen to someone who has raised from the dead. I wonder, if I had been alive 2000 years ago, if I would be like the Pharisees: beyond skeptical. I can see this trait in me, the same stubbornness that the religious leaders showed. It breaks my heart to think that I could respond to the Son of God in that way.
Then there were those who crowed Jesus to hear His teachings and to see Him perform miracles and maybe to ask Him for help or healing themselves. Sometimes I wonder if these crowds really desired to follow Jesus in the way that He taught, taking up their crosses and forsaking everything else- family, riches, status-or if they just followed Him simply because they were fans of His ministry. I think of superstars who are so cool and so popular that they gather a following, but who really cares to know them beyond what they give the public (music, movies, whatever)? Sure, we love them and we would love to meet them and even get a picture with them, but, if we're sensible, we're not going to drop everything to be groupies. We have our own lives that we're content living. I wonder if that's how the crowds followed Jesus. If so, would I be one in the crowd? Would I brag about being one of the five thousand that Jesus fed or seeing Him heal the lame man who was lowered through the roof for bragging's sake? Because I could see myself doing that as well.
Of course, there were Jesus' disciples, too, and not just the twelve. Luke accounts Jesus sending out seventy, in pairs, to teach and perform miracles in His name. I think that the disciples were so sincere in their commitment to Christ, as much as they could be, but their understanding was limited. Of course, when you place any group of people next to God Himself, they're going to fall short. Still, I wonder if they ever looked back to some of the time they had with Jesus and said, "Gosh, we were so foolish! What were we thinking!?" I know I do this often. And I will continue to do this until the end of my life.
I know that I really don't have much to really, truly base any of these characterizations on. But what kind of reader would I be if I didn't impose some of my human experience into what I am reading? I know that reading into Scripture is something to be very careful with, so I'm not equating it with the truth that we do find in God's Word, but if it was true, I wonder what category I would fall into.
I love where the writers of the gospels say that Jesus was moved with compassion for the people. I don't even have any commentary to add to that. Jesus was moved with compassion for the people. I'm not an overly emotional person. I tend to lean toward reason and logic any away from feelings and instinct. But what a wonderful feeling it is to think about the compassion of Christ. All of these people: the Pharisees, the crowds, the disciples, had personal interactions with Jesus, and He was moved with compassion towards them. I have not only read about His compassion, but I have experienced it. As I read about the compassion that Jesus showed many, many years ago, I am reminded of His present compassion that I am able to take part in and experience, and I cannot help but marvel and worship Him for His amazing goodness. We serve a wonderful God. How blessed we are to be called His children- and that is what we are!
God, I am sorry for those times my stubbornness and my pride and even my own ignorance get in the way of truly following you. Thank You for the compassion You showed thousands of years ago. It amazes me to think of how Your love continues even until now. You are not a dead God, but You are living and Your Word is active. God, may Your compassion draw me to repentance and to true discipleship. I may be naive and I may not understand much, but I desire to continue to grow in understanding. Lead me in these things, Lord. I desire to know You and to follow You, but I need You to show me how to do these things.
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